Kill the surface dwellers!

If I hadn't been living above ground for the last couple of years, I might have better identified with this viewer's comments. But since it's been so long since I lived underground, I can't really bring myself to commit acts of horrible violence against someone simply because they live above ground.

You see, it all starts back when I was a kid. It was 1974, very tumultuous times. Watergate & Vietnam pretty much defined the country's state of mind. It was no surprise then that the stork visited the wrong hospital that chilly may day and I was delivered to a small family of mole people.

Yes, there are such things as mole people. I was one of them. We lived in a network of tunnels and caverns that stretch out across vast distances, both under cities and under great rural stretches of this country.

The vast majority of society is completely unaware of the existence of mole people, but that doesn't surprise or disappoint them. They prefer to remain unknown. Who knows what kinds of horrible things would happen if the mole people were discovered.

Admittedly, it was soon determined by the mole people that I was not exactly a typical mole child. Whether it was my skin color, hair, or perhaps my size, I didn't quite fit the profile, nor the tunnels and caverns. My mole parents were of course blinded by love for their child. They didn't ask why, they just made their tunnels and caverns bigger to accomodate their child.

Years passed, and I lived a happy life. I was educated in the history and the ways of the mole people. I came to identify myself with being a mole. It was absolutely natural.

Until one day I stumbled upon a tunnel that led up, up to the surface. And there I saw for the first time, surface dwellers.

It felt like the earth had fallen down on top of me! It was all so mysterious and magical. I was entranced. Once my eyes adjusted to the light, I started to stare at all the weird people walking by. It was then that I realized I looked like those people. Was I a surface dweller?

As youth are prone to, I acted rashly. I burrowed quickly back to my home and packed my bags. My mole parents pleaded with me to stay, but I was set on returning to the surface and exploring. And so I set off, back to the surface and to this magical world.

Well, it's been a while, and the mystery has perhaps worn off. And I do miss my mole parents and friends, but I have yet to return to their world, feeling that somehow I have let them down. So I countinue to make my way in this world of surface dwellers. I have married one and she accepts me for one of them.

This is why I cannot commit any violent acts towards surface dwellers. I hope you understand.